Letter from Father

Dear Alysia,

Your recent post on what you don't like in a hotel room (yours being "crunchy carpet") got me thinking about my disdain for blackout drapes.

Why do I not like hotel blackout drapes? Let me count the ways... First I like to wake up to the sun in my eyes, the way humankind has been waking up this way for a million years. Why should a man-made piece of fabric stop this natural occurrence?

Second, most blackout drapes do not fit hotel windows properly. Not at all. The drapes then let in ultraviolet infrared radiation rays that are most annoying if one must sleep in the daytime (airline crews, night auditors).

If you agree with me, please call me 24/7 to exchange our mental distress on this most important subject.

Yours,
Father

(More about Father: In hotel business for several decades. Likes: bell carts with unsqueaky wheels, un-yell-y guests, a full house on a weeknight. Dislikes: waiters who say "no problem" when a customer thanks them for delivering a meal, walking a guest, blackout drapes.)